*Murder, Maybe

If you don't like to laugh at old people, better skip this story. My excuse is that I've been forgetful my entire life. _SJ

On the day she was to visit her home in England for the first time in three decades, Kit was found dead on her floor. The two friends driving her to the airport had pounded on the door, then used the key they knew she hid in the garden.

"At least she was drinking Earl Gray breakfast tea as she passed" said Kit's friend Margaret, referring to the china cup shattered on the floor by the body. "She loved Earl Gray."

"This just isn't LIKE her," frowned Kit's other friend Annie.

"Dying, you mean?" asked Margaret, sitting back comfortably in the recliner, as they waited for the arrival of the 911 personnel, just called. "I agree, it is a bit unusual. She's never done it before that I recall."

"Do you notice how untidy the apartment is," Annie gestured, ignoring the other's words.

Margaret looked around for the first time. "Why no, I hadn't. Being preoccupied by Kit's dead body and all."

"So now what do you say?"

"Why, yes, I agree with you. Untidiness isn't like her."

"So what do you think?"

"You’re the one who thinks."

"Kit was not about to leave a mess like this before a long trip."

"No, she wasn't. " Margaret took a deep breath. "Are you suggesting foul play?"

"I'm suggesting we have only a few minutes before the authorities come to find the clue Kit would most definitely have left."

"Why not let THEM find the clues? That's their specialty."

"Who knew Kit the way we did? We're wasting time Margaret. They're going to charge in here destroying evidence."

"Too bad Kit is dead. She could have helped us"

You take the bedroom," Annie ordered. "I'll stay in here"

"Wait a minute, what are we doing?" Margaret's head was spinning.

"Looking for incriminating evidence."

"What will it look like?"

"How should I know? Kit was a very clever woman. Far cleverer than whoever murdered her. Even more clever than we are."

"I object to that last statement" Margaret objected.

"Object later. Find evidence now."

"You're being rather relentless."

Annie looked at Margaret directly. "Someone murdered our friend. And I'm not happy about it."

Margaret nodded and sighed. "I'm a bit tired today," she said. "So I suppose I should come right to the point."

"You killed her, didn't you!"

"I was about to say the same thing to you!"

The two elderly ladies regarded each other suspiciously.

There was a long silence.

"I think we both did it," Annie said, flatly.

"What?!"

"I think we did it and then forgot about doing it."

"This isn't the first time you've accused me of being senile. And even if I were, forgetting that I murdered my friend is not exactly like forgetting to buy butter at the store.

"We didn't murder her. Technically, we just killed her. In reality, we assisted her to commit suicide."

"That's absurd." Margaret shook her head firmly. "Why would she commit suicide the day she was returning to her beloved home after all these years."

"Because of the letter," Annie reminded her.

"What letter?"

"You see how senile you are, Margaret, you've forgotten that already."

"Show me this so-called letter, Annie."

"That's what we're looking for."

"Well, why didn't you say so before?!"

"Because I FORGOT, you birdbrain, " Annie exploded.

"Do NOT insult my brain, just because I'm senile!" Margaret said, with dignity

Annie's brow furrowed. "What was I saying just now?"

"How should I know. Something about a letter from Kit's fiance Hilary."

"Hilary??!" Annie sputtered. "How could he have sent her a letter? He died during the war!"

"Kit had a fiance fighting in Iraq?" Margaret asked, puzzled.

"Not THAT war! She was 84 years old, remember? It was World War II !"

"Yes, but Hilary died."

"No, he didn't. She just got his letter yesterday, forwarded from her sister in England."

"Wait! This sounds familiar, Annie!"

"That's because she told us last night."

"No, it's a movie I saw with Bette Davis and - oh, what's his name? The handsome one."

"Brad Pitt?"

"Bette Davis and Brad Pitt never made a movie together, silly

"Why are we talking about a movie, when there's a dead body on the floor?" Annie pointed out to Margaret.

Margaret screamed. "Annie! There's a dead body on the floor!!!!"

Annie screamed. "Oh my God, it's KIT!"

"How could it be Kit? She's going to England today, to kill her dead fiance Hilary!"

"I'm confused. How could she kill someone who's already dead?"

"Oh Annie, you're even more senile than I am. Don't you remember the letter Kit's sister forwarded from England? It was Hilary, confessing on his deathbed that he had faked his death in Vietnam, to get out of his engagement with Kit?"

"Vietnam? Kit was too old to have been engaged to someone who fought in Vietnam."

"Did I say Vietnam? I meant World War II."

"I saw a movie once about Vietnam," Annie said, "with that handsome actor Brad Pitt, who gets killed"

"Was Bette Davis in it? Playing his fiance, now really old?"

"Bette Davis is dead."

"Is that who's body is on the floor?"

There was a pounding on the door.

"I wonder who that can be," Annie said.

"Kit, oh Kit" Margaret yelled into the bedroom, tripping over a body on the floor that she hadn't seen before. "Someone is here to see you."